Every guy talks about meeting the perfect woman. They spend all their energy in looking for that perfect 10, not realizing that it will never happen.
Goals like this simply aren’t practical. Trust me, I’ve tried. It’s like going to the casino and expecting a big win instead of just enjoying time with your friends. If your focus is narrow and unreasonable, it’s almost not worth playing.
When you make winning money your only objective then all of your choices will be based on potential earnings rather than common sense! What would be the point of playing if you’re constantly stressed and full of anxiety? Why trade a potentially fun night with the guys with apprehension?
Much like searching for that perfect woman, you need to shift your focus. Rather than narrowing in on what you want from women, it’s best to look at the bigger picture. What do they want? Where do they hang out? What are their interests? And where do they go to meet men like us.
Meeting women is really quite simple. Now that I know how, I don’t even have to try anymore. It just happens.
Talking to Women
This may sound a little too easy, but the best way to meet women is by talking to them!
When I was a kid, I was nerd. I was picked on for being short and having good grades. When I got to high school, it was even worse. I was awkward and never popular – but I always had a girlfriend. My geeky friends never understood how I managed to pull it off, but for me it was easy. I just talked to them!
Now, you’re probably wondering what does talk even mean? How would you start a conversation? What are the best opening lines? And if she response, where do you go from there?
I know the idea sounds too deceptively simple. But it’s not. Using my current girlfriend as an example, let me explain how I managed to pull it off. Let me show you just how easy it is.
Before I begin however, let me just clarify that I didn’t use any special tactics, or put in any special effort. I was just going about my life per usual, and it just happened. When you talk to girls, it will just happen. This is more a story about me living my life, rather than a concerted effort to meet women.
Let me first start off by saying I don’t go out with the intention of meeting women. Everything I do, every event I attend or organize, I do out of self-interest. I do them because they make me happy and they help me grow personally.
Take last month for example. A buddy of mine and I organized a get-together for local writers. We wanted to meet like-minded people that had similar interests. It was a chance for us writing geeks to get together in a positive and welcoming environment. The group that showed up was great! We met smart women and men of all ages, and were able to discuss our work among creative minds.
Many personal and professional friendships were born from this small gathering. From there I was introduced to friends of friends, invited to parties and even attended a wedding! My small networking event was clearly a success and it gave me opportunities beyond my expectations.
Best of all, I met Sarah.
Live Life for Yourself
Sarah was one of the many girls I met doing something I loved.
Not too long ago I gave myself a challenge. I challenged myself to learn something new. So I chose to learn to scuba dive…why not! Little did I know I needed to spend days in the dive shop classroom before even entering the water! It didn’t bother me much though. I loved talking to the instructors and subsequently the ladies in the dive shop.
I was fascinated by all the dive equipment and during the breaks I found myself talking to the ladies in the dive shop. I just had so many questions! Eventually scuba talk turned into personal conversations. And eventually personal conversations turned into lunch dates and lunch dates turned into after class outings.
Needless to say, of the many ladies in the dive shop, I really took to one of them. She had long shiny black hair, striking blue eyes, and the most amazing body. I never asked her for her number, but I knew it was mine if I wanted it.
When my I finally got my scuba license, I stopped going to the dive shop. My focus was shifted to something else and life continued on. I don’t go to the shop much anymore, but when I do, I’m always welcomed with a friendly smile.
She’ll Come to You
One evening, out of the blue, I got an email from one of my readers. She said that she was a loyal follower of my weekly column and admitted embarrassingly that she waits impatiently every week for a new article. In particular, she enjoyed the article about how not to wait in life for what we want. She said this is why she decided to email me. I was honored.
When I got to the end of the email, to my surprise, I finally connected the dots. She wrote,
“Hope you’re still scuba diving!” Signed Sarah.
Opportunities Are Yours to Take
Opportunities don’t come every day, but when they do, you have two choices. You can take it by the balls and roll with it, or stay on your couch watching TV. It’s up to you.
This opportunity was one I knew I couldn’t give up. I emailed her back immediately and invited her to a writers meeting. The rest as they say, is history.
I’m not saying that meeting women is as easy as pursuing your personal goals. But this is the first step. Common interests set up healthy relationships. Simple as that. When you have shared interests, you can ensure a great social life together. And when your social life is healthy, so is your sex life…
Guys confuse meeting women with needing pickup lines. Take it from me, this doesn’t work. To create a sensible relationship you need to plan your life first. Once you have that under control, the rest will come naturally.